Since my last letter to you, we have seen some struggles and some good times as well. I want you to know that I am very sorry that you are hurting due to the pain I inflicted upon you. I need you to understand that in order to help you through these tough times and those ahead, I need to begin to heal myself. That does not mean that I do not hurt or will not hurt every time I see the pain in your eyes; it just means that I have chosen to put God first and to allow him to heal me. I know that with God first in my life, then everything else will fall into place. I pray that you and our children see that in me and begin to do the same thing. In order for you to get true healing, you must take all focus off of me and put it on God. Normally, a woman would not like losing any attention from a man but I know that if you have God first then you will focus on our marriage and family in the appropriate way! I want you to know how grateful and proud I am of you for being so strong and for loving me with a love that only Christ himself can give you. I promise you that after almost losing you, the man of my dreams and best friend, I will rebuke Satan and hang on to God until death do us part and never let go again. I love you and I am devoted to you!