My good friend and fellow blogger, Fawn Weaver, founder of Happy Wives Club, is sharing on the next part of our What Is Love Marriage Series! She brings to light something that we have all experienced in some form, and encourages to remain hopeful in marriage! Enjoy!
Love Always Hopes
Early in my marriage, I noticed something peculiar. Although people claimed to be happy for my new husband, Keith, and me and excited about our new life together, the “advice” they would give us didn’t seem to line up with that truth. We were continuously confronted by negative comments about marriage everywhere we turned. We were dumbfounded by the number of friends, family members and casual acquaintances who would make comments with regard to how difficult marriage is and how once the “honeymoon phase” ends we will need to face the realities of marriage.
We heard about everything from the ‘first year blues’ to the ‘seven year itch.’ It was incredibly rare to hear someone speak words of hope about lifelong love and marriage. It was even rarer to hear the words “happiness” and marriage used in the same sentence. But there was at least one time I can remember and that conversation has remained with us for all our married years.
Just a few months after we were married, Keith and I were at a couples retreat. After one of the sessions, we were riding in the crowded elevator back to our hotel room. As usual, Keith’s arms were wrapped around my shoulders and my head was buried in his chest (he’s 6’4” and I’m 5’4” so I only reach his chest J). A woman in the elevator observing our affection began doing what so many had done before her, “Hold on to that. It won’t last long…”
Before she could even finish her less-than-positive statement, a woman who was speaking at the conference turned around and added her two cents: “Happiness is a choice. My husband and I have been married 29 years and we have chosen to be happy. Every morning when we wake up we choose to enjoy our day with each other. We choose one another.” With that, she looked Keith and I square in the eyes and said, “Choose to be happy and it will last.”
Finally, words of hope. Her words were heaven sent. They were like pouring rain on the Mohave Desert. They gave us hope that in spite of all the negative comments so often heard, there were those who still believed in the power of marriage and enjoying life as a couple until ‘death do us part’. We determined that day in spite of all the negative connotations associated with marriage we would choose to be happy. We decided we would wake up each morning and put God and each other first. We committed to one another we would enjoy every moment of this life together.
On that day, at that very moment, we learned happily ever after isn’t a fairytale; it’s a choice. We made that choice and we continue to make it each and every day. So please allow me to offer words of encouragement to you just like that wonderful woman did for us nine years ago. Never give up on love. Never stop believing in its healing and redemptive powers. And always, always give the love you hope to receive in return.
– Fawn Weaver happywivesclub.com
“Now faith is confidence in what we hope for and assurance about what we do not see.” – Hebrews 11:1
Take time to journal about your hopes for your marriage and then pray over them. Also, invite your husband to enjoy a special dinner to give each other the opportunity to talk about future hopes and dreams you desire to experience together.
I pray that I would have hope in my marriage. May you refresh my heart and remind me of the hopes I had when we first married. Hope ignites passion and purpose for living, so I don’t want to continue in my marriage without a heart full of hope. I also desire that my faith increases. I pray that you would help me to have more faith in you and what you can accomplish through us as well as have more faith in my husband and the man you have called him to be. I lift up my marriage to you and I pray that my husband and I can express our hopes for marriage over dinner and that it realigns us and fuels our passion in Jesus name AMEN!
Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered,it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. – 1 Corinthians 13 : 4-8
Questions to discuss in the comments:
What kind of hope did you have for marriage when you chose to marry?
What hopes do you have for your marriage currently?