I had a mentor meet with me just before my second baby arrived. She wanted to share a few nuggets of wisdom to encourage me, knowing that my life was about to change.
I sat next to her on the couch in a cute little coffee shop downtown. After catching each other up on our lives, she proceeded with words that will never leave me.
Remember that God has called you to be your husband’s helper, not the other way around.”
Her soft voice and gentle tone matched her endearing smile. Yet, her eyes looked at me with caution. I could tell she wanted me to hear the truth to encourage me in my journey as a wife, but she also knew that for some people the truth is hard to receive.
“How will she respond?” she must have thought.
I knew what she shared with me was truth. And I knew exactly what verse in the Bible she was referring to…
The Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper suitable for him.” – Genesis 2:18
But it was difficult to receive. I could feel my flesh wanting to fight her words. My mind racing about how to justify the help I won’t be able to give and the help I will need from my husband.
Then we continued to talk. That was important. I needed to understand that she was not saying I shouldn’t take time to recover after having my second baby and she wasn’t saying that my husband shouldn’t step up to help. It was obvious that those things would happen.
She was simply reminding me that God made me a woman, a wife, a helper suitable for my husband.
I want to share this with you because my baby is now a month old and my recovery is going great, glory to God! And during the day I hear my mentor’s words encourage me to help my husband. To get up and do what I can to manage my home, to serve my family and to do it joyfully.
You see, my flesh is lazy. Laziness has always been something I wrestle against. It is not easy to serve others when I am constantly justifying why I can’t. And the thing is, I can. My flesh just doesn’t want to. Also, laziness keeps me focused on my needs, and blind to the needs of others.
Being a helper is much more than managing my home and doing things around the house. Being my husband’s helper is about seeing his needs and helping him fulfill his role God has given him. To encourage him, to affirm him, to pray for him, to walk alongside him in faithfulness, to love him.
I could have allowed the transition of having another baby to keep me from serving and being a helper. I could have justified why I can’t do certain things because I just don’t have the energy. Then again, that would be me relying on my own strength.
Remember that God has called you to be your husband’s helper, not the other way around.”
I am my husband’s helper. Hearing these words replay in my mind motivates me to fulfill the role God has given me. It also reminds me to pray and ask God for the energy to help my husband, in any way that I can, to fulfill his role as the leader of our home.
I am so thankful for the truth being shared with me because I know I am honoring God and my husband by being a helper. Also, I have been doing way more to manage my home, to see my husband’s needs and meet them, to be proactive in serving my family, and it feels so good, so rewarding.
I hope these words encourage you today as you embrace the role God has given you as a wife to be your husband’s helper.
