10 Relationships in the Bible that Can Inspire Our Marriage (PART 2)

Hey, we’re Aaron and Jennifer Smith, your hosts of the Marriage After God podcast, and today’s episode is part two to 10 relationships in the Bible that can inspire your marriage. If you haven’t had a chance to listen to part one, please go check that out. You should probably do that first and then come back and listen to this one. Today’s episode is also brought to you by our resources created just for you. We have 31 prayers for my wife, 31 prayers for my husband, 31 prayers for my son and daughter. We have, if you’re thinking about that younger generation, maybe as a gift, we have 31 prayers for my future wife and my future husband. We also have our marriage story in the Unveiled Wife or a really awesome marriage resource called Marriage After God, where we do share bits of our story, but we also encourage you guys to think about and consider how God wants to use your marriage for his ministry.

Lastly, if you want to pre-order our brand new book that comes out in October, you can do that right now by going to the marriage gift.com. That’s called The Marriage Gift, 365 Prayers for Our Marriage, and it’s a one year marriage prayer devotional.

So if you want to check out that book, it’s the marriage gift.com. If you’re interested in any of our other resources, it’s shop dot marriage after god.com.

So this week’s episode, it’s a continuation of last week’s episode. Like Jennifer said, if you haven’t listened to last week’s, go do that first. And that was on the first five relationships we talked about. Were from the Old Testament, and after we got through those first five, we realized, wow, this

Going to take too long.

This needs to be two episodes. So this next five stories and relationships that we’re going to discuss are from the New Testament

And the reason that we’re doing this, we just felt inspired to think about how we can look at someone’s relationship with another person and see their character and the way that they interact with one another choices that they make and glean from it and pull from it and say, Hey, there’s wisdom here. How can we be applying this to our character or to our marriage? And so that’s kind of the goal with these sharing these relationships.

Like I brought up last episode, we’re not bringing these stories up in these relationships up to say, look how perfect this relationship was. We’re trying to glean from these stories that the Bible gives us any bits of wisdom and advice and things that we can kind of apply to our marriages. So that was just a little caveat, a little disclaimer, but there’s some really good stuff in these stories and in reality, we just want to kind of read them and then pull out of them things that we see when we’re reading them.

So, so far all the relationships we’ve pulled from have been a very positive look at, okay, what you should be doing in relationship. This one tucked right here in the middle is going to be showing you guys some things we should avoid, maybe yeah, the downfall could be when you choose sin. And so we’ll kick it off with this one, and then we go back to all the positives. So

This is the first relationship of this episode, but it’s actually number six of the list,

So don’t be

Confused. So this is Anani and Sapphira. And so if anyone knows this story from the New Testament, it’s in the Book of Acts. And why don’t you read, is that starting in verse, starting

Verse one, verse one, but a man named Ananias with his wife, Sapphira sold a piece of property and with his wife’s knowledge, he kept back for himself some of the proceeds and brought only a part of it and laid it at the apostle’s feet. But Peter said, Ananias, why has Satan filled your heart to lie to the Holy Spirit and to keep back for yourself part of the proceeds of the land? While it remained unsold, did it not remain your own? And after it was sold, was it not at your disposal? Why is it that you have contrived this deeded in your heart? You have not lied to man, but to God, when Ananias heard these words, he fell down and breathed his last and great fear came upon all who heard it. The young men rose and wrapped him up and carried him out and buried him.

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After an interval of about three hours, his wife came in not knowing what had happened. And Peter said to her, tell me whether you sold the land for so much. And she said, yes for so much. But Peter said to her, how is it that you have agreed together to test the spirit of the Lord? Behold, the feet of those who have buried your husband are at the door and they will carry you out. Immediately. She fell down at a speed and breathed her last. When the young men came in, they found her dead and they carried her out and buried her beside her husband. And great fear came upon the whole church and upon all who heard these things,

This is a intense story. This is literally the brand new beginning of the church being formed in acts. And the first thing I note about this, which again has nothing to do necessarily with marriage, but there’s this idea sometimes that the God of the Old Testament was like wrath and judgment and all these things and the God of the New Testament, he’s different love, grace, which he is. But the Bible says he’s the same today, yesterday and forever,

Which kind of shows that, yeah, he acted really

Quickly. He’s still a just God and he cares about our character. He cares about lying, he cares about all sorts of things, and thank God he doesn’t deal with all of us like this, but he did in this situation.

And so the warning here is that both of these two people in their relationship, in their marriage, they had agreed upon this thing that they were going to do and they lied. They were agreeing to not telling the truth, and that’s sin. And so the warning here is for those listening and for us, Aaron, that what are we agreeing with and how are we pulling each other into it and influencing the choices that we’re making?

Well, the Bible actually warns us as believers that we do not cause people to stumble in sin. And Ananias literally is telling his wife, this is what we’re going to do. And the interesting thing about this is if you don’t catch what’s going on, it’s not that the lying wasn’t that they came and only gave half the lying was that they came and gave the impression that they were giving the whole and yet kept some for themselves. So what was really happening is, and this is actually another good note for us in our marriages, is they were trying to look a certain way. They were trying to benefit themselves while getting all the benefit of the giving. They were trying to look good in front of all these Christians in front of the church, in front of the disciples, and fit in with what everyone else was doing in this movement of people being generous and giving of their homes and goods and money while still keeping for themselves, they were essentially, they were being

Were tempted facade. They were tempted by greed, but also by this idea that they cared about what man thought of them, but they weren’t willing to do it in a way of integrity of who they actually are. What

Instead of coming and saying, actually, we are keeping half of this for ourselves and we want to give half because they,

That’s done in honesty, that which would’ve been honest. That’s what Peter’s saying is you could have done with it how you wanted.

They wanted to be seen as just like all the other people that were selling and giving to Paul to distribute or giving to Peter to distribute, and they wanted to be seen that way. So they didn’t want to be seen as holding anything back, but yet they wanted to hold it back. The question I have for our listeners in their marriages as a couple, are they trying to look good in front of their church community

Or on social media?

Or on social media? Are they trying to present one image to the world, but internally

Acting like

Another, acting like another? We did this in our marriage early on. It wasn’t always intentional, but that we wanted the outside to think we were healthy and good and righteous and doing all these good things for God. But then on the inside, internally, there was a lot of other things going on that didn’t match the outside. Yeah,

That’s good. And then something that I’d like to just highlight is that when we allow sin into our relationship, and I mean even I know individually we sin, but even here they says that they agree to this together. When you agree to that sin in your life, your marriage is going to suffer consequences. In this couple’s case, they both died, but sin leads to death.

It says that when sin is full grown, it gives birth to death.

So what consequences are you enduring right now because of sin? Or can you recognize that you are going to be suffering the consequences of sin that you’re choosing? You need to repent. You need to turn from those ways and walk righteously and walk in integrity. Otherwise it will tear you down. It’ll destroy

You. And Peter makes a point, he points out to Anani. He says, you haven’t lied to me. You haven’t lied to man. You’ve lied to the Holy Spirit to God. And so when we, in our marriages, if we’re trying to present like, oh, look at how good we are, look at all these good things we do, and we’re trying to kind of put this image, this facade to the church so that they think, wow, look how great they are. And yet on the inside we’re selfish and we withhold. And they might be deceived the whole world around. You might see one thing that what you want them to see, but God actually sees your heart. That’s true. He sees exactly what’s true. And so you’re not actually lying to the people, you’re lying to God, you’re trying to trick him into thinking you are something that you’re not. And that’s not what he wants from us. He wants us to be humble and real and recognize our shortcomings and our faults and our weaknesses and be an offer up that truth to those around us as well.

That’s good. So now that we’ve got the conviction and an edification out of the way, let’s move on to some encouragement. Let’s look at some relationships that were really cool and did some really good things that we can draw from and say yes to.

Okay, so number seven is Priscilla and Aquila. It says right here, they’re always mentioned the scripture together.

Yeah, they’re a little combo,

Which is kind of cool.

If our names were in the Bible, I would want them to be mentioned

Together always like Aaron and Jennifer, Aaron and

Jennifer, Jennifer and Aaron. I’m just kidding.

Yeah, whatever sounds smoother.

I love this couple. I think they were really courageous and they’re one of my favorite relationships in scripture, and we’ll find out why soon enough. So

Acts chapter 18.

Yeah, we’re going to start in 18. After this, Paul left Athens and went to Corinth, and he found a Jew named Aquila, a native of Pontus, recently come from Italy with his wife, Priscilla, because Claudius had commanded all the Jews to leave Rome. And he went to them and he went to see them. And because he was of the same trade, he stayed with them and worked for, they were tempt makers by trade, and he reasoned in the synagogue every Sabbath and tried to persuade Jews and Greeks. And then later on in verse 18, it says, after this, Paul stayed many days longer and then took leave of the brothers and set sail for Syria. And with him, Priscilla and Aquila, I can’t say that word. He had cut his hair for, he was under a vow and they came to Ephesus and he left them there, but he himself went into the synagogue and reasoned with the Jews. When they asked him to stay for a longer period, he declined. But on taking leave of them, he said, I will return to you if God wills and he set sale from Ephesus,

How cool is it that? So Paul goes to visit this couple to spend time with him and then goes and stays with him. They invite him into their home. He works with him, so he’s like, Hey, let’s make tents together. And so now they’re working with Paul, making money with Paul. They’re essentially, they’ve taken care of him while he’s there, and then later on they even leave

With him, set sail with him, which I think is good. I said, I put a note here. They said, yes to God and to adventure. Here we

Go. This was something we would do probably if we didn’t have kids or well,

We did in the beginning of our marriage, opportunity came and we said yes.

Like yeah, let’s go. And so what’s cool about this that we can be thinking in our own marriages is do we have a heart of hospitality, not just to the lost and the unsaved and to our neighbors, but to those in the church, we’ve known people that they open their homes to missionaries, they open their homes to traveling pastors. They want to bless in that way. And it’s a neat ministry inside the church or

Even choosing to work with people, someone that needs a job and you invite them to work with you. We have friends that do do this all the

Time. That happens a lot in our

Church, and that’s awesome. They said that by trade, they were of the same, and so they worked together and I like that.

Yeah. I don’t know if anyone remembers. A couple of years ago I was building a building out a camper van, and I invited a friend of mine to come help me. He needed to work, and I was like, Hey, I need help. You need to work. Come work with me. And man, we got to have such awesome conversations and working together most days. And not only it’s a blessing that I’m getting help and he’s got a job, but we’re being blessed by being side by side already.

I actually see that a lot in our little home church fellowship of just the guys working with each other. And I really love that. I think it shows comradery and trust, and I’m sure you guys get to encourage each other all day long just by being together, talking about things.

Well, I’m thinking now of the women like you girls coming together and you guys have planned coming together for homeschool events and teaching each other’s kids and helping in that way that’s very similar. It’s like, Hey, we have this similar trade. Let’s do that together. I think that’s really beautiful.

So to relate it back to marriage, I mean, they’re working together. So I know that says we highlighted that they’re working with Paul, but they’re working together, they’re traveling together, they’re doing ministry together. And so for us, Aaron, I feel like we’ve spent our entire marriage doing ministry together, and it’s been a joy for me. Sure. Hard at times. And we’re made of flesh and we, there’s times that we’ve experienced tension or frustrations over work, but being able to work side by side has been really cool because I know that we’re doing something for a greater purpose more than just for ourselves. And we believe every marriage can do that, even if you guys both work. That’s the whole point of that’s why

We wrote the marriage after Forgot.

Yeah. That’s the whole point of why we wrote Marriage After God or do this podcast, is because we want to encourage you guys to open your eyes to the opportunities that you have where you’re at to do ministry together.

Yeah, that’s really good. They said yes, they went for it. And the last thing I wanted to note on this little section is how much better it is at times when you travel with friends. Oh yeah. There’s something really cool about that,

That,

All right, so Acts 18, we’ll continue on in this in verse 24. Now, a Jew named Apollos, a native of Alexandria, came to Ephesus. He was an eloquent man, competent in the scriptures. He had been instructed in the way of the Lord and being fervent in spirit. He spoke and taught accurately the things concerning Jesus. Though he knew only the baptism of John, he began to speak boldly in the synagogue. But when Priscilla and Aquila heard him, they took him aside and explained to him the way of God more accurately. And when he wished to cross to Aki, the brothers encouraged him and wrote to the disciples to welcome him. When he arrived, he greatly helped those who through grace had believed, for he powerfully refuted the Jews in public, showing by the scriptures that the Christ was Jesus.

So a lot of scripture, but really we’re highlighting here that Priscilla and Quillan knew

More accurately,

More accurately, the gospel, the gospel and what the truth was. And even though this man came along, who also he was eloquent and competent in scriptures and also knew very accurately what the ministry was of Jesus, it says though he only knew the baptism of John, so there were parts of what he was teaching that could be he was missing, refined.

Well, what he was missing was the baptism of Jesus, which is believing in him for his salvation, which is a

Pivotal essential part of the ministry. And so when they heard, they took him aside and explained to him, and I love that boldness. I love that they not only knew the truth themselves, but were willing to go to the brother and say, Hey, you need to know this because it’s essential. And they were willing to write there, share it with him. And it impacted the ministry because then it says that he continued on and he traveled and he continued to share about scriptures in Christ. And

As a couple, when you spend time with other believers, the idea is that you guys are rubbing off on each other. And Paul, they spent time with Paul and Paul rubbed off on them. I’m sure they talked so much about these things on a boat and while traveling. And so it was just, they were full of that wisdom. And so the moment they had that, they see something, they’re like, oh, here’s a brother here that is missing an essential part of the gospel. Let’s share with them. And they did.

So the encouragement for us, you guys, is that we would be a couple, a marriage who seeks the truth to know the truth, to learn the truth ourselves, but to also have the boldness to come alongside others and teach them and encourage them. And so that’s really good. I just love that. Also, they’re mentioned in Romans 16, starting in verse three, it says Greek, this says Preska. And I don’t know if that’s just a variation of Priscilla and why they did that, I don’t know. But it says, preska and Aquila, my fellow workers in Christ Jesus who risk their nexts for my life, to whom not only I give thanks, but all the churches of the Gentiles give thanks as well. And so again, just I put the notes, courageous couple, they’re risky. They go the link. They like the adventure. They like the adventure, but they also know what’s important. These people know what’s important, and I like that about them.

And then it looks like in one Corinthians 1619, it says, the churches of Asia send you greetings, Aquila and Prisca together with the church in their house, send you hearty greetings in the Lord.

Here they go again, being super hospitable,

But not just hospitable. They have a church in their home. Yeah, yeah. They’ve they’ve said yes to like, Hey, there’s people here that needed to be churched, need to be discipled,

And they look for it. So making sacrifices and being willing to surrender the things and the resources and the material possession and the place and everything that we have, are we offering it to God and saying, do with it what you want, not just what I want. Are we risking our lives for others? Do we know what’s important?

Maybe on a lesser level, because at some point maybe our lives need to be risked. But if you think about livelihood, are we willing to forfeit finances? Are we willing to forfeit time, energy for the sake of those who need it?

It’s cool. I love the ministry of these guys, and I think that it’s a good example for us to look at for marriage.

So number eight, we’re almost done. Jesus,

We’re not almost done. We just

Started. And Peter, James, and John. So this isn’t just a dynamic between two people. This is a dynamic between four people.

Kind of that combo we saw in scripture of it says it is talking about Jesus, and then it’ll say Peter, James and John, I think here we just wanted to highlight just that intimacy of that inner circle of Jesus calling these three men to very important and mentionable things that happened and occurred in his ministry.

So this is when he heals the little girl in Mark five, starting in verse 37. And he allowed no one to follow him except Peter, James and John, the brother of James.

And he ended up healing her. This is the story of when he says, Talitha Kuai little girl, get up and everybody thought she was dead, and here she is awake.

Yeah, he presents it her to the mom, but he just wants to go in. And what’s really cool about this is him having Jesus of course, is Jesus having the awareness of the situation and not inviting everyone in to come see this thing that he’s going to do, but only a few people, only a few people, to keep it small, probably for the sake of the family, probably for the sake of the circumstances, not wanting to overwhelm this little girl when she comes back to life, maybe, I don’t know. But he wants these three because he knew that they were going to be integral in the proclaiming of this information and putting it into the gospel as it’s disseminated throughout the,

And I’m sure New Testament for their heart’s sakes as well. He was revealing his power to them in that moment, even though he was doing it for the little girl they saw, they witnessed for their sake, which I think is cool.

So why don’t you say this

Next part in Mark nine, Jesus lets Peter see him. And then Peter’s response is so beautiful. Oh, and it’s Peter, James and John again. So starting in verse mark nine, verse two, and after six days, Jesus took with him Peter, James and John and led them on a high mountain by themselves, and he was transfigured before them, and his clothes became radiant, intensely white as no one on earth could bleach them. And there appeared to them, Elijah with Moses, and they were talking with Jesus. And Peter said to Jesus, rabbi, it is good that we are here. Let us make three-tenths, one for you and one for Moses and one for Elijah, for he did not know what to say for they were terrified and a cloud overshadowed them, and a voice came out of the cloud. This is my beloved son. Listen to him. And suddenly looking around, they no longer saw anyone with them, but Jesus only,

What an amazing thing. I think it’s right before this. Jesus even says to all of us disciples, some of you will see me in my glory before you die essentially. And I think it was alluding to this moment that some of them, Peter, James and John would be standing there seeing this transfiguration him and his glory and his glorified body. And what’s cool is they get to also see Elijah and Moses.

I love his response though that he was like, we didn’t know what else to say because we’re terrified over here. So I’m just going to offer what I know. Hey, you want me to build you a tent? I just love his response there. But again, this is Jesus revealing himself to these people. And I liked what you said about knowing that this was going to be foundational to them proclaiming the truth as time went on.

Well, and something that we could pull out of this for our marriages is Jesus recognizing that these men who had a very important ministry after Jesus dies, preparing them for that, making opportunities, giving these specific times to give them what they need, to prepare them for what they’re going to do to love them and solidify in their hearts their relationship, who he is, because that’s what they were. Witnesses of the life, death and resurrection of Jesus Christ. Witnessing his transfiguration, witnessing his miracles, they had firsthand experience.

That’s good. So two more incidences or moments with Jesus. Mark 14, starting in verse 32, and they went to a place called Gethsemane. And he said to his disciples, sit here while I pray. And he took with him, Peter, James and John, and began to be greatly distressed and troubled. And he said to them, my soul is very sorrowful even to death, remain here and watch. So again, he didn’t say this to everybody, but he took the three aside and he was like, it says that he was greatly distressed and troubled. Jesus invited them into an intimate space where he could be vulnerable with them. And then he even tells them what he’s feeling. My soul is very sorrowful even to death. So for me, the example here is are you inviting your spouse into that intimate place where you’re sharing your heart with them, whether it’s in pain, whether it’s in sorrow, whether it’s stressed or overwhelmed or happy or joyful. It doesn’t matter what the thing is that you’re going through, but are you telling them? Are you inviting them?

I think sometimes in marriage we’ve experienced it at different times when we’re going through something hard, when we’re broken, when we’re angry, when we’re hurting, we tend to not want to anyone to be in push away. We want to go recluse, we want to hide. Jesus draws in his friends. And then I love that he says, remain here and watch. And so the question is like you were just asking, but it just stated a different way. As a husband or as a wife, do you want to be the kind of spouse that when you are hurting, when you are scared, when you are struggling, when you are dealing with things that you don’t know how to deal with, that you’ll go to your spouse and ask them to remain here and watch meaning, will you be next to me and watch over me because I’m pray for me where I’m at right now. I need you to be that for me. And Jesus calls his friends in to do this. Now they have a hard time with it because tired, and they really didn’t understand what was going on, but for us, but

The point isn’t that they walk out this relationship and what Jesus wants perfectly because look, we’re all going to fail. The point is, are we trying?

Yeah, and like I said, this is not a specifically perfect example for marriage. I’m just, we can draw out of it this idea. How are we inviting our spouse in to be there, to be near us and to watch over us as our helper?

That’s good. The last little moment with Jesus here is Mark 13, starting in verse three. It says, and he sat on the mount of olives opposite the temple, Peter, James and John and Andrew asked him privately, tell us when will these things be and what will be the sign when all these things are about to be accomplished? And Jesus began to say to them, which I really want to dive into, but that’s not the point, man. What he gives them is so profound and beautiful and awesome that he was willing to give all that information up. But the point here is that Jesus, and well, in this case, there’s four people because Andrew’s there with them. They had the type of relationship and friendship where there was space safety, an atmosphere of being able to ask questions and get answers, cry a little and share a little.

Well, they also, they trusted Jesus. And so when they have questions and confusion, they go to him, Hey, what are you talking about? When are these things going to take place? And does that happen in our marriages? Do I come to you, Jennifer for my heart’s questions? Not that I think you have all the answers, but you’re like, you’re my friend, you’re my partner. You’re my lover.

Because the alternative is looking

Elsewhere.

Exactly. Searching elsewhere, finding comfort elsewhere, right? Yeah. So that’s a good point. I think too, in light of this being kind of like a group relationship where there’s several men and Jesus, I think a huge benefit to in marriage I would say, and I think you would agree with me, is having friends, a close inner circle of friends who you guys can also do these things with. So with your spouse asking those questions or giving those answers, being vulnerable and praying together. But also do you have an inner group of maybe other married couples who believe the same and think the same and can encourage you and can support you and can feel safe in being vulnerable together? That has helped our marriage so much. Still to this day, we have very close friends when we’re going through stuff. That’s who we want to go hang out with and call and get help.

One last thought I just had, and what’s awesome is it’s a group of people going to Jesus. And so I’ll ask you husband and wife, do you go to Jesus together? Is he your main source of information is God’s word? That’s what it says. Jesus is, is the word of God. He’s the way the truth in the life. He’s the light unto our path. He is the bread of life, the living water, all the things that we need to live. Is that where you go in your marriage or do you go to your podcast first? I’m not saying podcasts are bad, I love podcasts, but is that where you go first? Do you go to you as a marriage run to God in prayer, run to his word in adamant seeking, knocking on his door, expecting him to open to us. And so these men, they know that Jesus has the answers. And so, and your husband, do you and your wife go to Jesus together like they did?

And it sounds like if you do, you’ll experience some pretty incredible extraordinary things just like Peter, James and John.

For the most part, Jesus always answered when they asked him questions like when they would’ve parables, they’d be, Jesus, what are you talking about? And then he would take ’em aside and he’d explain the parable to them, be like, well, the parable means this.

Alright, moving on. So this next one is also with Jesus. He’s just dominant in the New Testament. It’s about

Him.

Number nine is Jesus and Peter, which I wanted to narrow in on just their friendship because it’s really beautiful, all about reconciliation and affirmation. Jesus calls Peter to follow him and invites him to be a close disciple. So in Mark three 16 it says he appointed the 12 and starts out by saying Simon to whom he gave the name Peter. So he calls him

And not just calls him, but gives him a special name. I think about our friend Cody, who’s got all sorts of special names for his wife, for everyone. For everyone. Yeah. He’s got nicknames and multiple nicknames sometimes for every single person

In his life. They have five kids and every kid has four or five different names that Cody calls them. Really?

But they sweet respond to every single one of them. Oh,

It’s sweet

Every time. Yeah,

We love

You, Cody. It’s like so calling someone as in like, follow me, your mine, it’s

Endearment.

And then giving a new name, which is endearment.

Moving on in Luke 22, starting in verse 31, it says, Simon, Simon, behold Satan demanded to have you that he might sift you like wheat, but I have prayed for you that your faith may not fail, and when you have turned again, strengthen your brothers. Peter said to him, Lord, I’m ready to go with you both to prison and to death. And Jesus said to him, I tell you, Peter, the rooster will not crow this day until you deny me three times that you know me. What I love here obviously is that Jesus was praying for Peter. He was praying specifically that his faith may not fail. And so the question here is in that space of intimacy, are you praying for your spouse? Do you know what their weaknesses and you can kind of see it and the temptation that they struggle with, and are you praying that their faith doesn’t fail?

And that’s probably some of the deepest love you can have. And the second deepest part of this love that he has for Peter is do you think Jesus stopped loving Peter knowing that he was going to deny him three times? No, no, no. In fact, Jesus loved him so much. He warned Peter, Hey, you are going to deny me three times, and guess what? I’m still going to the cross for you. He loved Peter knowing he was going to fail him. So the question for us, do we have that kind of love for our spouse or are we just waiting for our spouse to fail to point out how we are of them or to prove to ourselves like, oh, see, they haven’t lived up to my love anyway, or are we going to love them knowing that they are going to fail us? When I proposed to you, I’m pretty sure I said, I’m going to fail you. You’re going to fail you a lot. Yeah, you did. I warned you so, but that’s where Jesus, he’s saying, Peter, you’re going to deny me three times. He’s like, but I’m praying for you. And he says this a lot for his disciples

Also, when Peter responds with Lord, I’m ready to go with you both to prison and to death. Such a declaration, such a heart of just being gung ho. And I think sometimes I’m

Sure he meant it too well,

Especially in early parts of a relationship or engagement and even declaration of the wedding day and vows, we commit to quite a bit, and we are excited about it and enthusiastic about it. It’s like this power

Charge until those things confront

Us, until we’re confronted, and then what happens? We actually do fail. We fail each other. Aaron and I have failed each other, and I’m sure you listening have walked through seasons of failure. But I love how Jesus responds to Peter amidst his failure and they are able to still reconcile. And so that’s what we’re going to look at next. So Luke 22, starting in verse 60, it says, immediately while he was still speaking the rooster Crow. So this is after he denied Jesus for the third time, and the Lord turned and looked at Peter and Peter remembered the saying of the Lord, how he had said to him Before the rooster crows today, you’ll deny me three times. And he went out and wept bitterly. I don’t know. It obviously does not give a lot of information about what that look at Peter was, but I just want to highlight it because I think so much is said in just eye contact, in just thinking that there’s this moment between them where they recognize Peter recognizes what he’s done. And Peter, I feel like Jesus is saying, but I still love you. Yeah,

Well, eye contact, it’s a big deal. There was a person I just went and met with recently, and we’ve had some hard issues in the past with each other, but I made a point to look at him in the eyes the whole time. I wanted him to know that I was there, and even though things were hard, I was there and I was intently looking at him. And that look that Jesus gives, I would imagine was just one of compassion and love and forgiveness and not to shame, and not even probably to remind him, but probably him knowing, oh, he’s denying me and I know he’s going to feel guilty. And he wanted to make that connection of like, Hey, I’m still here,

Man. Okay, so then in John 21, starting in verse 15, it says when they had finished breakfast. So this is after Jesus dies and resurrects

Real quick before you go to the next one.

I know. Did I move too

Fast? Yeah. I want to say one more thing. How do you feel when I make eye contact with you? I

Love it. I love it. There was this early in our relationship, we’d be at an event or in church or something, but distance between us. Oh, talking about you would literally wait. I don’t know how long you waited, but you would wait for me to catch your eye and I’d look at you and you’d wink at me every time and it just nothing.

The thing is I knew I didn’t have to wait long. You were always looking at me. I was always looking at you, but I would wait for you. And then the moment you’d look at me, I’d wait at you. It would melt

Me. Yeah. It just made me feel so close to you, even though nothing was said. Just the shared look.

Yeah. And I also, I think about the times that we’re in a conflict and it’s hard to look at each other. It’s like you want to look down, you want to look at the wall, you want to turn away. And

My thing is, is you’ll be staring at me, especially if I’m really frustrated, imm

Just staring. I’m not even saying

Anything. I’m just like,

What? And I’m like, what?

Say something. And then

Usually I’m like, what to you? What’s going on?

Oh

Man. There’s a lot in eye contact. It’s a big deal.

I think we can say a lot as couples with our eyes, our countenance is really important.

I think you can move on.

Okay. I was just trying to set this up. So this is after Jesus dies in resurrect, and he’s having breakfast on the shore with his disciples, and it says, when they had finished breakfast, Jesus said to Simon Peter, Simon, son of John, do you love me more than these? And he said to him, yes, Lord, you know that I love you. And in this conversation, after they’ve eaten together, they say this phrase three times, and I love that because three

Slightly different ways, but it’s three

Times and I feel like it’s healing to know that he denied him three times, and then he said, I love you three times. It’s just

Beautiful. Well, and what I love about this is in the reconcile, it wasn’t that Jesus needed him to reconcile for all three denials. What he was doing is he was saying, he’s like, as long as you come back to me every time, I’m going to forgive you and I’m going to ask you, do you love me? That’s good. The fact is, and he’s like, Lord, you do know I love you. And he’s like, then good to feed my sheep. He’s like, because you love me. It not prove it. He’s saying, because you love me, you can go do these things. And that’s what we

Like freedom.

Yeah. Because I would imagine he probably, I mean, they went back to fishing. He was with the Lord for three years, and then all of a sudden he’s like, all I’m good for is fishing. And God’s like,

No, no.

That’s not why I walked with you for so

Long. Okay. So in terms of marriage, we need to be able to remind each other after we failed, that you still have purpose in the Lord and you’re still capable of doing ministry. You’re still,

And you’re still my wife, and you’re still your husband.

We’re still going to be married. We’re still going to raise our kids and do all the right things. And no matter what, even if we mess up, we are going to mess up. That was a really good one. That was good. Just

Saying.

All right, ready for the last one.

Okay. This is Paul and Timothy,

Which I know if you guys are familiar with their story is more of like a mentorship. So there’s an age gap, but I still like this story in terms of a positive relationship and how we can apply it to marriage. So in two Timothy one, starting in verse three, it says, I thank God, I thank God whom I serve, as did my ancestors with a clear conscience as I remember you constantly in my prayers night and day. So just stopping right there and saying, Hey, he’s praying for his brother in Christ. Are we praying for one another? Prayer is so essential. You guys know this through our ministry, we prayer.

That’s why we wrote our newest book, the Marriage Gift specifically. Hey, pray every day for your spouse.

It’s important. Okay, so verse four, as I remember you, as I remember your tears, I long to see you, that I may be filled with joy. So again, these phrases and these way of speaking about someone that you love is so beautiful to me. And do we have those kinds of eyes and a heart posture towards our spouse?

Yeah. Good. That

You longed for

Them. That’s a good phrase because someone mentioned I was talking to a while ago, ships passing in the night. That’s a phrase that,

Or roommates or

Roommates or things get monotonous and tired and bitter sometimes. But God can work in us and desires to work in us that we would have where I long to see my spouse. I want to be home. I don’t want to always escape. That’s what God wants for our marriages, that we have this desire to be like Paul, he desired to be with

Timothy. Well, and it says that I may be filled with joy. He knew that that friendship and the presence of that person would bring him joy. Do we have that in marriage? Do we have that place where when they get off work and come home, there’s going to be joy? If not guys be praying for that, be praying for that specifically. Well, and

One of the things that brings him the joy is in the next verse, I’m reminded in verse five, I’m reminded of your sincere faith of faith that dwelt first in your grandmother Lois, and in your mother Eunice, and now I’m sure dwells in you as well. For this reason, I remind you to fan and to flame the gift of God, which is in you through the laying on of my hands, for God gave us a spirit, not a fear, but of power and love and self-control. Oh my

Gosh. Again, something that we need to remind each other in marriage. So faith is believing what? You can’t see how many, it’s

The assurance of things hoped for,

The assurance of things hoped for. So do I have faith that God has given you purpose, Aaron, and that he’s called you to walk in it every single day? I hope so. I do. But do I encourage you every day to fly into fame, the gift that God has given you? Yes, I should be

And I should be doing the same. I should be reminding you daily faith, not

To fear

Faith, reminding you daily of what you believe

And to not fear. Yeah.

Yeah. Because to be honest, that fear word comes up a lot in various ways,

In all sorts of ways. Or to have self-control.

Exactly.

That’s good. Okay. Starting in verse eight, therefore, do not be ashamed of the testimony about our Lord nor of me, his prisoner, but share in suffering for the gospel of the power of God who saved us and called us to a holy calling, not because of our works, but because of his own purpose and grace, which he gave us in Christ Jesus before the ages began. Now, Paul has a tendency to keep going, and there’s no period, but for the, he’s theorist for it, for the sake of just ending there, we’re going to move on. But I just love that his heart for Timothy was to encourage him in this idea of don’t be fearful, but empower and in love and self-control. Don’t be ashamed. Share the testimony of Christ.

I think the biggest thing that many marriages are missing, why there’s so much divorce, why there’s so much brokenness, so much roommate living, this idea of being so separate and not unified, not power and feeling, the power of God, not having that love for each other is we’re missing the gospel sometimes the thing, our marriage in every aspect when we’re struggling, we need more of the gospel, more of the truth of Jesus Christ. The power of God is what it says, and that’s what allows us to get through those things. That’s what reminds us of why we’re together. That’s what reminds us of the purpose of our marriage. And what God’s trying to do is that it’s Jesus Christ who saved us, that it’s his work that justifies us, that it’s not by anything we do, but by what he has done. And anytime we’ve gone through things, when I’ve tried to encourage you, this is what I focus on. What is the truth? What do we believe as a man? I do try and fix things, but often this is what I point us to.

So looking at the relationship of Paul and Timothy and hearing their words and saying, there was so much spiritual support here. They were confident in faith and on the same page to share the gospel. And so the question here for those listening and for us, Aaron, is are we spiritually supporting each other? Are we checking in? Are we eager to see each other and be present so that we can be filled with joy? Are we praying for each other?

Is our desire that our spouse grows more in their love of God and in their relationship with him? Or is it just that they become more of what we want them to be for us?

And how can we encourage each other on a daily basis to step into that of sharing the gospel, whether it’s with each other, with our kids, with our friends, with community, just with our lives? Are we doing that because we all need encouragement to do that more?

Amen. That’s it. That’s our 10

That did it. That wraps it up, guys.

You made it. I’m glad we split into two episodes, 2 45 minute episodes.

So again, if you didn’t get a chance to listen to the part one, you should go check that out. And also, if you really enjoyed, this was kind of like a different spin on how we usually do the podcast and share this content, share with a friend if it spoke to you, if it encouraged you, especially if there’s a relationship who has spiritually supported you or encouraged you or has meant a lot to you. You can even pull out which number you felt like, Hey, you do this for me. Thank you. Send them that.

And if you are the husband or the wife that regularly listens to our show, but maybe your spouse does not, would you invite them to listen to these two episodes with you? I think that’d be really cool. Have a discussion about these relationships. See what you can draw for them.

Okay. At the end of every episode, we like to give you a little growth spurt, a challenge to focus on this month. And we’ve been doing this since January, which I think is really fun. And this month we’re calling it fall for each other all over again. So we want to encourage you or challenge you guys to reimagine that first date.

Is it because we’re getting into fall? Yeah,

That was the plan. Okay. But it’s also just good to remember to reminisce

Or to just pretend, have fun. Like, oh, let’s pretend we’re on our first date. What would that look like?

Oh, what would it look like today? Yeah. Oh, that’s fun.

You said reimagine. I was thinking like, oh, what if you, it’s like a recreation, but like a twist. Anyways,

Cool. I like it. Go do it. Go date each other.

All right, let’s pray. Dear Lord, thank you for the many examples of relationships from Your Word and in our lives that we can glean from and learn to grow in our character. As we strive to have a thriving marriage, we pray we would choose to love each other every day we pray. We would choose to walk in humility and righteousness. May your will for us abound as we chase boldly after your will for our life together. In Jesus’ name, amen.