A few weeks ago I had the privilege of flying to Little Rock, Arkansas to visit Family Life and be a guest on their radio show to talk about my marriage story and my book The Unveiled Wife.
I took my 3 month old baby girl with me for the short three day trip. My heart was sad to leave my husband and son behind, but I assured myself I would see them again soon.
I was proud of myself the morning of our departure when I successfully packed all of our stuff into the smallest carry-on suitcase there is. I strapped my daughter inside her carrier, threw my computer bag on my back and wheeled the suitcase into the airport terminal. I got through security without shedding a tear, focusing on not loosing my daughter’s pacifier and making sure her blanket stayed off the ground.
I can do this!” I kept telling myself.
And I did do it! I did it all…all by myself.
I boarded the plane, then carefully unstrapped my daughter and wrapped her in her blanket to lay across my lap. My hope was to have a peaceful flight with her and that she would sleep for most of it. I didn’t want to budge an inch in any way so I didn’t wake my sleeping beauty. I sat as still as I could.
After only a few minutes my arm started to tingle, the way it does as it is going numb from a pinched nerve. But I was stubborn and I held my position despite being uncomfortable. Every few minutes I would attempt to wiggle just a little to keep my blood flowing, but not enough to wake up the baby. Her head was nestled into my arm which was wrapped around her. My muscles ached from the weight of her body resting on me.
By minute 40 I was losing.
My muscles were shaking and my confidence in my ability to hold up my baby was shrinking. I laid my head back a little and closed my eyes, then all of a sudden the tip of my elbow dropped about half of an inch and there it was..where it had been the entire time…the arm rest!
I had no idea!
In my desire to keep my baby asleep and in my stubbornness to do it all on my own strength, I neglected to realize that the arm rest was readily available and accessible to assist me.
Relief radiated through my whole body as the pressure was lifted off my muscles. I could keep my position and the baby remained asleep! It was wonderful.
As I considered the arm rest and how it had been so close to me the entire time, I laughed a little in my head. I felt so silly trying to do everything on my own strength. Then God revealed to me how often this happens in life in His relationship with people.
I do this, and you might too.
We strive to do things in our own strength, our own way, on our time…all while God is not only available, accessible and close by, but more than capable to help us through everything we go through. He is strong, He is reliable, He never grows weary and He is there for us.
So why do we convince ourselves that we can and should go through life on our own? Why do we celebrate all that we can do on our own, when we can do infinitely more with God?
This was a very big eye opener to me and encouraged me to evaluate my heart toward God. I am sharing this story in hopes of helping you see whether or not you are allowing God to help you.
**For those of you interested in the rest of my story, the interview with Family Life went great! I can’t wait to share it with you when it is live. I love Family Life and the incredible resource they have been for people all around the world. They help families, they help marriages, but most importantly they point people toward God!